We have all been in a room where a friend, family member, colleague, or acquaintance has said something mean or inconsiderate. And as a result, they hurt our feelings. Or irk or depress us. You ruminate over the happenings and that adds fuel to the fire in your brain. Notice if the pattern of your breathing changes when you become tense. Observe if the pitfall begins where you create stories inside your head and get angrier. You probably feel exhausted from the over-thinking?
If I may, here are 5 tricks and tips to help you manage your annoyance and in turn, conserve your energy no matter the company.
1) Deep Breathing
Close your eyes and breathe deeply. Doing so can release both tension and uneasy feelings out of your body. Oxygenation of the brain reduces stress. Breathing correctly can release pleasure-inducing neuro chemicals in the brain to elevate moods.
2) Focus on the Important
It’s easy to get caught up in the “How the heck am I going to deal with XYZ at work or the next work event or dinner party?” Tell yourself that nothing is permanent. You have to handle them for a little bit and then it’s done. They have no control over you or your life. You are who you are and their words hold no power over you. “No one can hurt you without your permission.”
3) Don’t Attach Intention to People’s Actions
I am not going to give you a morality speech on how most people are nice. And that you should learn to forgive and move on. No. Sometimes it’s hard being the bigger person. But I will say that people come from different emotional spaces. Their behavior isn’t always a reflection on you. They might be carrying their own baggage that has nothing to do with you.
4) Become Mindful of Whom You Allow Into Your Life
According to Jim Rohn, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” The people we spend time with the most influence the person we become. It’s because of the collective sum of the consciousness combined with your personality and individual consciousness. If you hang out with a bunch of pessimists, who believe the world is out to get them and there is nothing meaningful, you will start descending into the tunnel of pessimism at some point. Even if you are initially a positive individual, you will become negative and angry.
5) Build Better Walls
Oftentimes, with family and coworkers, you don’t get to pick who you spend time with. You can’t tell your boss or aunt or a colleague: “You deplete me. Not hanging out with ya.” There are certain social expectations that you might feel pressured to meet. That said, you can still protect your energy. You always have the option to not create intimacy with someone who ruins your mental peace. You always have the option to respond, not react.
Truth
You are the only one losing out if you react to every person and in each situation. The person, who has something terrible to say, moves on to their next “victim” sooner than later. So, why should you be paying for another person’s immaturity and giving them the importance they don’t deserve?
source:
