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Friday, February 4, 2022

Think you won't find love on a dating app? Meet the couples who did

 


If you've ever tried online dating, you'll know how demoralising it can be.

You're left thinking: Will I ever find someone? Is every man obsessed with fishing and cars? Is every woman's bio about how much she loves her dog?

But right now, apps are one of the only ways to meet new people — especially if you're in lockdown.

We spoke with three couples who found each other after a right swipe and are still together.

'I was about to quit the app'

Emma (29) and Beato (30) – Tarneit, VIC

A laughing Emma gives a speech at her wedding, Beato smiling next to her.
Emma and Beato on their wedding day.(Supplied)

Emma

I had just broken up with my ex so I thought I'd get on the app and see how it goes. I was ready to put myself out there.

But it was too much for me — I couldn't keep up with all the messages. I was about to quit the app when Beato said hi, and I thought, 'Oh, I'll just give him a chance, this is my number.'

He was a bit suspicious that I was so open so fast, so he called from a private number and luckily, I answered. I said, let's just do something simple for our first date and go for a coffee. I didn't want it to be awkward if things didn't go well.

Guess where he took me?

To 7-Eleven.

It's such a brickie thing, because he'd never had real coffee. I was like, OK, we'll go to 7-Eleven and go for a walk at the park. But let's have a second date so I can take you to get real coffee.

We were really comfortable with each other from the start. I think me being really open helped. In previous relationships I would be all guarded and have my walls up. But with Beato, from day one I said, look, I want to get married and have kids.

We've been together six years now. Some days we do get tired and frustrated. But we just remind ourselves that no matter how mad we get with each other, it'll pass and we'll be fine again.

Emma and Beato lie in bed and take a selfie with their baby, Koa.
Emma and Beato are now parents together.(Supplied)

Beato

When I met Emma, we just connected and she was easy to talk to, very mature. I just went, I'm not going to lose this one. After two weeks, I committed and never looked back.

Now we have a son together. He's a good boy. I never thought I could love something or someone so much, and watching him grow is just the best thing.

I always tell people I'm a part-time bricklayer, but a full-time dad. It's unreal.

I love how Emma just knows how to be a loving and caring mum. She knows how to take care of him and me. I'm pretty useless sometimes, and she's just amazing. I don't think I would ever be able to cope if I didn't have her anymore.

'In quarantine, I had a lot of spare time on dating apps'

James (26) and Tom (29) — Enmore, NSW

James and Tom pose arm in arm, holding cocktails, under a sign that reads 'the music sounds better with you.'
James (left) was in hotel quarantine when he matched with Tom (right) on a dating app.(Supplied)

James

I had got back from New Zealand just as COVID hit and was one of the first groups of people that had to go into two weeks of hotel quarantine.

While in quarantine, I had a lot of spare time on dating apps.

I started talking to Tom, and we really bonded over Survivor — that was pretty much all I was watching at the time. And then once my two weeks was over, I was finally able to go over and actually see Tom and meet him.

Tom

In that lockdown, it was this situation where nothing was open, but you could have one person at your house. So we just alternated between having dates at each other's houses.

James's housemates at the time were a bit concerned about me being a healthcare worker, because I was working as a nurse in the COVID clinic and in emergency. So we were often at my house.

For our first date, we watched Parasite. I don't know why I chose that movie … we couldn't even talk to each other, because if we didn't watch the subtitles, we'd have to pause and rewind.

It feels like we've been dating for so much longer than we have, because you get to know each other so much when your dates are just watching a movie in each other's bedrooms, or ordering in, or going for a walk somewhere.

James kisses Tom on the head as they stand at a sodden outdoor concert, wearing raincoats.
Tom and James have spent most of their relationship in and out of lockdown.

James

After that first lockdown, we had a little trip to Port Macquarie planned. I think we were both feeling it, and Tom was ready to say 'I love you' on that trip.

But then I got a bit ahead of myself and said it first one night after we'd been to the gym. Just lying in bed about to go to sleep, nothing romantic. And I was responded with, 'I'm on the same wavelength.' So Tom had a big plan to say it in Port Macquarie and I'd ruined that plan.

'You can find love in the most unexpected ways'

Andrew (31) and Silvia (32) – Carlingford, NSW

Andrew and Silvia take a selfie in a graffitied laneway.
Andrew and Silvia met on a dating app, and now have two kids together. (Supplied)

Andrew

I was working on one of the navy bases down in Victoria. I'd been there for a while and I thought, you know what? I'm going to try and meet some new people. And so I jumped on a dating app.

Over a couple of days, we talked for a quite a while, to the point where I got in a little bit of trouble with work because, sorry, Silvia was more interesting. We met up not long afterwards, and it just flowed from there.

I had never met someone who I could speak to so openly and freely with ever in my life until I met her.

I think I was looking for engagement rings at the five month mark, and proposed after almost seven months of dating.

Andrew kisses Silvia on the head on their wedding day.
Andrew proposed seven months into their relationship.(Supplied)

Silvia

We wanted to have kids, but we didn't expect to have them so early. We now have a two-year-old son and a one-year-old daughter.

When my daughter was born, because it was the middle of COVID, no-one could come out [to Australia]. So it was just us with a one-year-old and a newborn, just the two of us, no family support. It was very hectic.

After I gave birth, and because of the stress of COVID, I did suffer postpartum depression. And I had no help except Andrew. He's been amazing throughout that, so understanding and loving, and he's been a very patient dad and husband at the same time.

You can find love in the most unusual place or in unexpected ways. You just have to keep looking and the right person will be worth it.

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